On getting house trained

I was definately a handful for my gran. She would buy me tpretty dresses for church and fancy frilly dress for Easter. One Easter, she dressed me up in this big dress that poofed out and some tights that had little bows on them. Boy, was that an itchy outfit! She put shiny patent leather shows (complete with a bow) on my feet and bows in my hair. Then, she made her mistake. She sent me out to the porch to sit while she got herself ready. I was bored and hot and uncomfortable (and itchy), so I somehow ended up in the sandbox and made BIG pretty mudpies. I even tasted a few of them, but they werent so great really. When my gran came out, she was really, really mad and switched me with a hickory. But, in the end, I won. I wore a nice comfortable demin jumper to church, and it didnt even itch!

Gran had this porch swing that would lay on at night alot, and watch the stars and bunnies grazing. I could literlly reach out catch fireflies. I always had this idea that I would catch enough fireflies to make a lantern, but somehow they always escaped after I went to sleep, no matter how tight I screwed on the lid. One night I woke up with a real bad pain in my belly, and gran took me out so that I could lay in the swing to wait on momma to come home. It turned out that I needed to have my appendix removed.

Surgery wasnt so bad, but the silly doctor said that I had to be still for a couple weeks. He really didn't know what he was asking of me. The day I came home from the hospital, Gran put me on the couch to rest and watch TV while she worked in the garden, but I heard the neighbors kids playing football in the field in front of the house. Well, I went out just to watch, but I ended up playing football and Gran caught me. I got another hickory that day too. I really used to sit in my tree and fantisize about cutting down that hickory bush.

I also got to start school while we were living at my Grans and momma got a job working in the school cafeteria so she could be with me more since she also worked second shift. I was very excited about school on the first day, but quickly decided that I didn't like school so much after all. The kids all teased me because I looked different, and kept asking me if I was "mixed" and where my daddy was. So I asked momma.

She told me a little about my real dad, that he was Cherokee and that's why I looked different. She also told me that he didn't want me, so he left. I was hurt and angry about not having a dad and got pretty sensitive about being teased about it, so I ended up in a lot of fights. After my first year of school, I took alot of pride in how tough I was and how well I handled myself in a fight, but I was still miserable so I told momma to find me a daddy.

About the time I got out of kindergarten, momma and I moved to our very own house! It was green and it had three rooms, a bedroom that momma and I shared, a living room with a kitchen, and a small bathroom. All round the house was a huge cornfield that I loved to play in. I caught snakes and lizards and brought them home to play with every day. We got a cat, and a red irish setter named "Red". (original huh?) Red died shortly after we got him and we replaced him with another irish setter named "Missy".

A couple weeks after I started 1st grade, I came home to find momma sitting with a man on the couch. She looked me straight in the eye and said "I think I have found you a new daddy". Well, what's a kid to do? I just stood there and stared. I think my first words to him were "Do you like snakes?"

In short time, we moved in with him. This new house was huge, five bedrooms, a kitchen, a dining room, a living room AND a den, plus two bathrooms upstairs and another downstairs, and a basement. I snuck out of bed the first night we were there and walked wround drawing myself a map because I was so afraid that I would get lost. But things settled down soon enough, I learned to help out in the restarant that we now owned, and learned my way around the house well enough to sleep at night. Things were good............

But my new daddy, well, he wasn't what I expected. He yelled at me alot, and once he got so mad that he spanked me. The next day, he had some friends over and he made me pull my pants down and show them the bruises. I really didn't like his friends very much. They always said stupid things like "kissed any boys lately" or ask me to model a bathing suit for them. Daddy always thought this was funny, and he liked to tell them how nice I was going to look when I got a couple years older.

And Momma said "I'm gonna have a baby". I shrieked and screamed and giggled with joy. A baby brother or sister, how I had wanted one (I end up with many many many). I watched momma's belly grow, howled with delight when I could feel the baby moved and listened carefully with stethescopes to hear a little heartbeat. Then, in the middle of the night, she got up and left for the hospital.

A waitress from the restarant came to babysit while momma had the baby. When daddy came home the next morning, he told me that I had a little brother and we could go see him and momma the following morning. I thought that since daddy was home the babysitter would go home, but that night I heard noises, so I got up to go investigate. I found daddy and the babysitter, naked on the couch. When daddy saw me, he got my little chair and made me sit and watch them, telling me that he would whip me if I got up. After she left, he told me that when I got older, we would do those things and that I would keep my mouth shut or REALLY bad things would happen to me and momma. I believed him, so I kept my mouth shut.

This just opened a door for daddy. After this, he would sneak in and watch me take my bath, and sometimes I would wake up at night to find him standing at the foot of my bed, masturbating. Eventually, he got to where he would make me touch him there. If I complained he told lies to momma, maybe that I had called his friend a "bitch" or spit in his drink, so that momma would be mad at me too, and I would be punished by both parents.

Momma had changed, I thought that she had begun to hate me once the baby was born. Her punishments were getting worse and worse. She hit me alot, and her and daddy fought alot, most of the time about me. Once, he told her that she had better get me under control or he was leaving her and me and my brother. So momma whipped me, and locked me in a closet fora day and a night. When she let me out, I had peed in my pants, and was whipped again. She told me that I was a mistake, that I had messed up her life and she never should have had me. She has a good chance at a good life with this man, and I was screwing it all up.

All thing from a mother who had rarely even spanked me. I missed my gran. I missed my tree and going to church on Sundays. I missed fried chicken, and the porch swing. And I just didn't want a daddy anymore.